They Can Only Do What You Allow
- La'Chris Jordan
- Jul 28, 2020
- 2 min read
Updated: May 24

Author’s Note (2020 Post)I wrote this in July 2020 during a season of deep clarity and reflection. At the time, I was speaking to myself just as much as I was speaking to others—unfiltered, raw, and protective of the feminine spirit.
While my voice today carries more softness and grace, the message here remains:You teach others how to treat you by what you allow.
I chose to keep this piece not because I live in that fire, but because I survived it—and learned how to alchemize it into power, peace, and higher standards.
For every woman who needed a reminder:You are not a utility. You are not a convenience.You are sacred. And you are allowed to expect sacred treatment in return.
Ladies, quit crying. He treats you like that because you let him. You allow that bad substandard treatment. Repeatedly.
You know why he pays his rent? Because the landlord don't care about his problems. Pay or get evicted.
You know why he pays his phone bill? Because Verizon, AT&T, etc. will cut it off if he don't.
You know why he pays his car note? Becaue the car loan folks will repossess it if he don't.
You know why he returns his boss' calls? Because his boss signs the checks and he values money.
You know why he is focused when it comes to his career? Because he values self-growth and stability.
So, why doesn't he treat you with the same respect like he does all of the above? Because he doesn't value you. He knows you will accept his excuses. He knows you won't cut him off.
So, what do you do? Do like AT&T and all the others and cut him off until he starts to act responsibly with you. Simple. If not, then find someone else who will. You're not any less valuable than his possessions and career. In fact, you're worth more if he knows how to utilize and partner with you correctly.
That's it, that's all.
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